Mommy's Night Out

Thursday, October 8, 2015

At the conference I'm attending, there are a lot of networking opportunities. And one of those opportunities was a conference sponsored "Night Out". Typically I would balk at these events. Going "out," drinking, or socializing after 9 pm is not my idea of a fun night. I'd rather be already curled up in bed. Hey - I'm a twin mom ... gimme a break. I honestly can't tell you the last time I was actually out though ... must have been well before the twins were born, or even conceived to be honest. But I did it and I had a fun night after all.

I chatted and dined with co-workers, reconnected with an old college friend, danced until the early morning hours, and met a lot of people from other companies. I thought it would be sad - to see all of these people and still feel alone ... to still yearn for my marriage and be lost without the comfort of knowing I have someone back home, someone that wanted to check in on my well-being, that worried what I was up to that night. And sure there were pangs every now and then where it would creep up. But I tried to shove it to the back of my mind and enjoy the present - not focusing on what my past held.

I can't say this will become a regular activity. I'm no longer a big-partier and my ideal night has switched to Disney Jr. shows with the girls, an early bedtime and then an eventual glass (or two) of wine. I think I've turned very much into a homebody that I never thought I would be. But it does provide me comfort in those moments or days when I know longer have the crux of a serious or long term relationship to lean on. When I have to rely on myself to be comforted.

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