Find Joy!

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Over the past few weeks, I've really been thinking about what "joy" looks like to me. What in my life inspires me and motivates me? Where do I find myself happiest? I'll stop you right here and preface with the fact that I'm not 100% sure I'll ever find out what completely looks like "joy" to myself.

(unless it equals living on a tropical island with endless adult beverages on a forever-cation)

I have found it more and more inside of myself rather than in other people or things. My heart is happiest when I'm confident, and I'm focused on goals. It leaps for joy when I do things that make me proud (handling crazy twins all day by myself? yes!), when I anticipate the goodness of what's to come, when positivity is present in my life. I also find joy in my children - watching them hold hands or care for each other, or when they learn something new or do something silly ... it brings joy to my heart.

I've been pretty focused on a new life motto for myself; "Nothing is worth it, if you're not happy."

I think life is too short to be anything but happy. And the end goal in this crazy adventure is to find what brings joy to your soul, what ignites love and passion, what sparks something inside of you and keeps you moving forward. Why wouldn't you want to be happy? And everyday should be an adventure in re-discovering all of the wonderful things on this planet that help us experience that happiness.

What Motivates You?

Thursday, May 12, 2016

It's funny when life is good and things are looking up, you're suddenly filled with enthusiasm and motivation. Granted, I still sit around and do absolutely nothing a lot of the time. But my thoughts do not turn grim with hopelessness or restlessness - at least they haven't for quite some time. I've been thinking a lot about what motivates that change? When does that light bulb moment occur? I've been feeling a strong tide in my life the last few months - like a small spurt of electricity skimming the edge of everything ... something (good) was on it's way. But what brought it forward? What after all of those months cloaked in grief, sadness and dispair, did I lift my head and finally *saw* the sun again? Honestly, I couldn't tell you. But I have a smidge of an idea.

Part of it has been time - and getting through the worst of my fears months ago. The day my ex stood in front of me and told me she was in a new relationship felt like my soul had been released and my heart was finally free with the last heartbreaking blow. I cried a big sobbing mess of a cry. And then gathered myself up and moved forward. I think that was a big "click" moment in my brain. 

From there, I kept living life. I did things I liked and realized when there were things I was doing that I didn't like (copious amounts of wine, anyone?). I got active again and started to regularly go to the gym and picked running back up (although I'm on a 2 week hiatus from my Nashville trip and need to get back into that) which fueled me feeling better about myself overall. I laughed again. I enjoyed my friends and I laughed and laughed. I no longer felt the absence of someone no longer sitting next to me as I experienced my life. It gave me strength. 

And then a funny little thing happened, I met someone. Someone that I truly like and that gives me hope that love is out there again. I could have never even imagined that this time last year. But when you feel something *real* again - it'll change you. And work started getting better too. Opportunity and hope that things won't always be the same - that there is potential and growth and people care about me as an employee. That provides hope too. 

And I think all of that stuff swirling in a little tornado, if you will, over the past few months have made for a perfect little storm of happiness, enthusiasm and motivation. It's opened my eyes again, it's made my heart feel good things again, and it's brought just a breath of fresh air - of what a potential future on any aspect of my life could be. That's something that I didn't have 12 months ago as I felt my world falling a part.

But as time always will - it's all slowly putting itself back together. 

It's Been Awhile

Thursday, May 5, 2016

Hi loves - it's been awhile since I've posted and I wanted to check in and ensure everyone that all is well! I have a lot going on in my life lately and it's all been really, really good stuff.

I recently vacationed in Nashville where one of my best friends was on the receiving end of an amazing proposal, and have been plucking away with work and the girls as the weather starts to warm. For the first time, in a very long time, life is really, really good.

I'm thinking of taking a little bit of a hiatus, to enjoy this wonderful little life I got going on. I still want to write and share via this blog - I just am not sure when that's going to happen. Stay tuned, I'll be back :)